Nah, I'm kidding.
I rant about Skype and its piss poor User Experience.
Microsoft, I'm blaming you. Just so you know. Get your shit together, now is a good time to listen to your consumers. Well… that, or show me the data that supports your poor choice in designing this particular aspect of the Skype User Experience.
So here's my problem. Whenever I'm signed in to Skype and decide to quit — without signing out first — Skype feels the need to ask me if I'm sure.
Why, yes Skype. I am sure. [checks box marked "Do not ask me again"]
Next time. I quit again without signing out. Skype disappears completely and hastily, just like I told it to. Who's a good boy? Who's a good Skype? You are! Yes you are!
But then it happens. One morning when I'm a little tired, not quite paying as much attention as I should, I sign out first. It just happens and I don't really even reflect on it at first but then I notice it. Right there, at the bottom of my screen lingering in my taskbar. Skype. But I thought I quit you? Oh, I just signed out. Well, no harm, no foul I suppose. Honest mistake. I'll just press quit right here and…
Wait? What the fuck is this? I already told you specifically to "Not ask me again". Do you remember Skype? Well do you?! Bad Skype! Bad, bad Skype! Shame on you! [smacks Skype with a thick Christmas edition of the Cosmopolitan].
The worst part? I can't teach Skype to not ask. Now, because whoever was responsible for this part of Skype I have to either;
a) Remember to always "quit" right away whilst signed in.
b) Always answer Skype's stupid "Sure you want to quit Skype?" question.
Microsoft. Take note. This is a stupid and pointless question — from that user experience thing I talked about earlier — because I am already signed out and can obviously not "send or receive" any 'effin messages at this stage. You know? That signing out bit you have there? Yeah, that's what preventing me from "sending or receiving" any instant messages. I already did that. You should have asked me this question when I was signing out. When I'm trying to sign out from Skype, this question makes perfect sense because then you would be informing me, the user, that the action I just requested will have this effect and thus giving me the option to cancel that effect because I simply can not live with those consequences. Which I suppose you kind of did with the first time you asked me and gave me the option "Do not ask me again".
But then you went and took a gigantic dump on my metaphorical carpet as soon as I turned my back to you and that… Skype… is not cool. Not cool at all.
Your current "flow" suggest that by quitting Skype I won't be able to send or receive any messages, but that simply isn't true. At this stage it doesn't really matter if I quit Skype or not, I still won't be able to send or receive any messages. I know I already said this once but I'm just repeating myself to make sure you understand it, you seem a bit slow.
Bad Skype! Shame on your UX! Bad, bad Skype!
